In 2023 America, this Bud's for dudes. And not just any dudes - dudes who think they're women. Because after all, in today's day and age, the very best ladies have penises.
Bud Light has marked the return to warmer weather with a signature beer can featuring the face of Dylan Mulvaney, a transgender TiKTok star who has spent the last year parading around as a gross charicature of "womanhood," to commemorate Mulvaney's one-year anniversary of being a "girl."
Which he's still not. But hey, science.
Mulvaney thanked the beer conglomerate for featuring his make-uped mug on their new aluminum 6-pack with a video that can only be described as stereotyping women for being too stupid to know anything about sports.
"I kept hearing about this thing called 'March Madness.' And I thought we were all just having a hectic month - but it turns out, it has something to do with sports," a heavily-styled Mulvaney performs for the camera. "And I'm not sure exactly which sport, but either way, it's a cause to celebrate!"
"This month, I celebrated my 365th day of womanhood, and Bud Light sent me possibly the best gift ever: a can with my face on it!" he then says, with max drama.
Dylan Mulvaney has become the new brand ambassador for Bud Light. 🍺— Oli London (@OliLondonTV) April 1, 2023
The beer brand even made a special edition Dylan Mulvaney Can 🥤celebrating his 365 days of girlhood.
(This is not April Fools, it’s actually real)
🍺🍻🍺😒🍻🍺🍻 #dylanmulvaney #trans #transgender pic.twitter.com/xuu87WxrvZ
Another Bud Light-sponsored video features Mulvaney in a bathtub drinking out of their beer cans. I'd show you, but there's not enough bleach in the world.
Bud Light must think women are too flighty to be into sports, that men are gender-blind enough to want to guzzle beer out of a can with a crossdressing man's face staring back at them, and that all of us are too stupid to know this man with a penis is still a dude - no matter how many "days of womanhood" he claims to have had.
The answer of which is zero.