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Save The Snowflakes Offers Prescription Crayons For Gorsuch Confirmation

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After the confirmation of Neil Gorsuch to the United States Supreme Court early Friday, many snowflakes have fallen into a deep depression.

Accepting Hillary Clinton’s loss, Donald Trump’s win and now a Gorsuch confirmation has been shown to be too much reality for snowflakes, who have to hear opinions they don’t agree with and may have difficulty reaching a safe space.

Because of these extremely trying times, Save The Snowflakes has begun offering prescription strength crayons.

Studies show these crayons are 100% better for therapeutic coloring in the confines of a safe space, drawing hearts and rainbows, as well as making protest signs.

It is thought that these crayons positively affect communication between nerve cells in the central nervous system and/or restore chemical balance in the brain.

Talk to your doctor to make sure the right colors are available based on your race and sensitivity to gender pronouns. Be sure to use all coloring therapy crayons in a safe place, where harmful thoughts and opinions can’t influence a fragile snowflake.

Using prescription crayons in those 18 and older may cause prolonged living in your parents basement, the inability to debate without using words like ‘Nazi’ or ‘racist’, a compelling need to be part of a drum circle, strong affection for geriatric senators from Vermont and/or confusion on which public bathroom may be suitable for you.

Studies have shown that snowflakes that color with these prescription strength crayons have an increased ability to go outside for short periods of time, can cross streets without protesting and have a decreased frequency for the need "to have a good cry."

Remember prescription strength crayons like these are only available through Save The Snowflakes. Visit savethesnowflakes.org for more information.

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