San Fran to Remove 'Offensive' Statue Showing the Spanish Defeat of Native Americans


In a heroic display of social justice bravery, San Francisco has effectively saved their populace from another deadly hunk of metal standing around doing nothing by removing a statue depicting a Spanish cowboy standing over a Native American.

After more than 30 years of ranting, activists successfully convinced the city to remove a statue they say “inappropriately celebrates the oppression of Native American people,” according to The Hill (despite the fact that the statue’s removal does nothing to change the nation’s actual history).

The "Early Days" statue, which portrays a missionary standing over a cowering Native American man while a Spaniard gazes off into the distance, has been standing there doing absolutely nothing since 1894. It’s part of a larger installation called the “Pioneer Monument” that tells the story of the state’s founding – which, like it or not, includes the arrival of the Spanish and the ultimate defeat of many of the area’s Native American tribes. Despite this historical non-changeability, the Perpetually Offended got it in their heads about three decades ago that the statue was offensive and should be removed.

After years of debate, at least one failed vote, and a number of acts of vandalism against the statue, the San Francisco Board of Appeals voted unanimously on Wednesday to take the monument down, against the wishes of some who claim the removal of the statue defeats the entire purpose of the larger monument that tells California’s story. Officials say the statue may be removed as early as next week.

Because who cares about facts and history when you have feelings, right?

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