The New York Daily News, that bastion of intellectualism featuring such literarily icons as Shaun King (i.e., “Talcum X”), uncovered a brank new level of ridiculousness Thursday in an article entitled, “It's time we all stopped saying ‘God Bless You.'"
It’s not enough that liberals have blurred gender lines to the point of child abuse, sucked the joy out of Christmas and labeled all white people "racists" simply for not having enough melanin.
Now, they’re telling us we shouldn’t be polite.
Author Ariel Scotti argues the phrase “bless you” is no longer necessary in the 21st Century, since “the plague is no longer a thing."
"Does anyone buy the devil/sneeze connection anymore?" she queries.
But, even placing medieval superstition aside, offering your flu-ridden coworker a courteous “bless you” may also be offensive, Scotti notes. Firstly – and perhaps most obviously, to those who’ve come to memorize the predictably repetitive liberal argument – the person being “blessed” might be an atheist/Satanist/Pastafarian. In this case, "blessing" him could rank among the highest of personal affronts.
“Someone of another faith may not appreciate your blessings if they perceive you to be of another (potentially opposing) set of beliefs,” Scotti warns.
But trampling all over someone’s overly delicate religious sensibilities may not be the only toe you step on while offering a simple “bless you,” she adds. The socially-accepted practice also appparently places an “unnecessary expectation” on the sneezer.
"In the absence of a 'bless you,' an alternative could be for the sneezer to say "=;excuse me,' as one might with any other involuntary bodily function (ok, gas)," Scotti bemoans "That might take the onus off the sneeze witness and allow us all to carry on without worrying we're committing a serious social faux pas."
If uttering a sneeze equates committing a “serious faux pas” in your book, you’re probably sneezing wrong.
Additionally, if your definition of opinion writing includes chastizing folks for observing everyday social manners for exactly zero reason, you’re probably writing wrong.
But in the spirit of accommodation, if I ever happen to bump into Scotti in the CVS pharmacy line, I'll forgo the blessing and just say “screw you,” instead.