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Kate's Killer Was Acquitted, But No Worries - We're Nabbing Illegal Alien Bologna!


In a serious win for legal immigration, U.S. Customs and Border Patrol seized 227 pounds of illegal alien bologna at the U.S. border last week.

I mean, Kate Steinle’s killer was acquitted last week after being deported five times, stealing a firearm from a federal agent, discharging it in public, shooting Steinle in the back in broad daylight and killing her. Just a couple days later, an illegal alien who'd been deported 20 times was sentenced to 35 years in prison for kidnapping and raping two Oregon women -- but hey, we managed to stop dangerous deli meats! Rest easy, Americans.

According to this, CBP nabbed a woman driving across the U.S. border through a port of entry with more than 200 pounds of illegal bologna stashed under her floor mats. That’s a no-no at the border, so we apparently confiscated the meat rolls, slapped her with a $1,000 fine, and CBS wrote an entire story about it.

Now, I get it. Illegal contraband being smuggled across the border can be extremely hazardous. Unregulated meats can cause disease outbreaks if sold to the public at, say, a local deli. Restricted plants can carry destructive insects. Counterfeit toys like hoverboards can be defective and dangerous. So if we manage to nab somebody trucking across the border with a door panel full of Salmonella-ridden rotisserie chickens, all the better.

But it seems counterintuitive to point to the confiscation of these items as a major win for border security when umpteenth-time deported illegal aliens with rap sheets as long as my leg can simply walk into California, shoot somebody, and get off scott-free, or when women in Portland can't sleep in their own homes or walk around in a parking garage without being sexually assaulted by someone who shouldn't even be in the country in the first place.

Tell you what: you use those nice taxpayer-provided resources to apprehend the dangerous violent criminal, boot him out and – most importantly – keep him from coming back, and then maybe we’ll get excited about stopping killer cold cuts.


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