NYPD Arrests Screaming Hippies and...Dolphins Blockading Citibank Headquarters

Justine Brooke Murray | September 6, 2024
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The New York Police Department confronted a blockade of screaming leftists chaining themselves to Citibank’s headquarters, yesterday.

It went as well as you’d expect:

“Citibank, you can’t hide! You’re committing genocide!” screeched a human chain of elderly hippies, as they struggled to lie on the ground.

Their getup was different from their typical Yasser Arafat cosplay. This time, officers were seen arresting demonstrators dressed as… dolphins. Why? Because the pro-Hamas cause is “intersectional” with global warming, of course!

“Hey city, get off it… the planet over profit!” screeched other demonstrators, dressed in various costumes and slogans.

Yesterday’s embarrassing display at Citibank was to protest both the company’s funding toward fossil fuels along with their partnerships in Israel.

Organizers say this was their last demonstration in their months-long “Summer of Heat” campaign. So they needed to come up with a big finale.

That is why so-called “faith leaders” showed up in “religious garments,” and self proclaimed “scientists” came dressed in lab coats. Other kooks reportedly arrived cosplaying as orcas, a replica of a yacht, and one “large wooden oil tanker.” The last costume likely means he/she/it was also a member of “Fatties for Palestine.”

Related: Flashback: ‘You’re All Insane!’ Iconic Comedian Joan Rivers Rips Media Defending Palestine

Needless to say, the result was a throwup of woke splattered all over Citibank’s sidewalk.

The only thing these demonstrators achieved was preventing over 1,000 tired employees from getting to work, and bragging about it.

The protest’s website also boasts over 5,000 participants and over 600 arrests throughout their string of disruptions over the past few months.

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