Attack of the, um, Attackerman

Stephen Gutowski | July 27, 2010

No, seriously, that's what Spencer Ackerman calls himself at FireDogLake and on twitter. He's a scary guy, you see. We all should tremble in fear before him... well, you know, rhetorically. Here we see the terrifying Attackerman in his natural habitat; at a cocktail bar with a bunch of other scary liberal bloggers whining about those meanies on the right calling them names (language warning):

Yup, there he is. Clearly a terrifying beast from the great abyss come to shake the souls of conservatives. Goodness.

I'm not sure I've ever run across a less intimidating person who writes with more violent imagery. For fun lets compare Attackerman the soul crusher with Spencer Ackerman.

Attackerman the glass smasher:

Find a rightwinger’s [sic] and smash it through a plate-glass window. Take a snapshot of the bleeding mess and send it out in a Christmas card to let the right know that it needs to live in a state of constant fear. Obviously I mean this rhetorically.

Versus Spencer Ackerman the confused:

Attackerman the unforgettable:

Lenny Ben-David, you and I will meet someday, face to face. I hope it comes very soon. I promise you it will be an unforgettable experience.

Versus Spencer Ackerman the cuddly bearded guy with glasses:

My gosh Spencer. Please give up this ridiculous charade. You aren't intimidating and nobody is afraid of you causing them any sort of harm, physical or otherwise.