Crossposted on NewsBusters.
“We make a lot of jokes on this show, but there’s an issue that I feel deserves some real attention, and it’s not easy to talk about, but brace yourselves: Ted Cruz hates dildos....As Mother Jones dug up earlier this week, in 2004, Ted Cruz fought to preserve a law that banned the sale of dildos in Texas....It’s just such a shame to see dildos persecuted and marginalized by one of their own. Right?....I’d expect more from one of our most prominent human dildos, and I just think dildo-Americans should be standing up for other dildos. Is all I’m saying here. But you know I guess back in 2004, Cruz was just another self-hating dildo....Now Cruz also wrote, ‘There is no substantive-due-process right to stimulate one’s genitals for non-medical purposes unrelated to procreation or outside of an interpersonal relationship.’ This is a guy who defends this phallic symbol [picture of a gun] but thinks the problem is this phallic symbol [picture of a dildo]. All right? Which means, which means he thinks we should live in society where it should be easier to off women than to get women off. Yeah, I went there.”
— Comedy Central host Larry Wilmore on The Nightly Show, April 14.